Mom?

Attention soccer moms:

SLOW THE FUCK DOWN!!!!!

I know you have to get little Hendrick to soccer practice and that whatever fucked up name you named your little girl is late for ballet, but they post speed restrictions for a reason. I know your life is more important than that of someone else's kid because you are to cool to drive a minivan so you drive an SUV. Seriously, I hate you. Get off your cell phone, quit sending your kids to useless activities like violin and painting, and spend some time with them. Also I live in a school zone so please slow down, don't honk at me when I'm on my skateboard in the middle of the road, and relax.
Or your child will grow up to be this guy or these girls
D