ESL.

It's a pretty well-known fact that the cutest people in the world are ESL students. They can never get their words quite right, and don't understand the difference between saying "This food is the shit", and "this food is shit", so most of the time when you're hanging around them, you spend your time smiling and shaking your head. So cute!

However, cute doesn't get you very far in this world. "Cute" gets you a sweet job at the dollar store. At some point, you may want to fully assimilate into western society and get a regular job, such as a drug dealer or pimp. Unfortunately, this means that you're gonna have to take your language to the next level. Here's where the "Off the Hook" textbook comes in handy. Learn phrases such as "You actin' like a biotch", and skyrocket yourself from adorable ESL student to hardened street-thug.

~sarah p.